Welcome to Fazil’s 100 Must Watch Movies of the Decade. You see, I came across a lot of this sort of listing all over the Internet from time to time. Thing is, I never liked them because it always has really old movies that I have not seen; new movies, particularly from the action genre, are always omitted. So I say screw them and let me come up with my own list.

I have chosen movies of the last decade, i.e. released from the year 2000 till now, because prior to 2000, I wasn’t a movie buff and I have not seen that many films (though I am slowly catching up on them now!). Thus, I wouldn’t be the best person to provide you guys with such a listing if that be the case. Also, you will notice omissions of truly great movies released this decade as well, such as ‘Moulin Rouge!’, ‘Catch Me If You Can’, ‘Traffic’, ‘Blow’, ‘Million Dollar Baby’, ‘Chicago’ and ‘Mystic River’ just to name a few. Believe it or not, I have not actually seen these movies!

100) SAW

Why is it on the list?
I am sure you are now sick of hearing about the ‘Saw’ franchise. How many are there now anyway? 6? Honestly, I have given up after the second one, or was it the third one? I can’t remember but the first was indeed a classic. It was the movie that started it all and was rather fresh at the time. The bathroom scene, the bear trap scene etc. It made me bought the DVD of the second film, but obviously I got tired of it after a while. And not to mention the little doll on the tricycle was rather freaky at first but then one of the ‘Scary Movie’ series destroyed that rather frightening image.

Favorite scene
The scene in the toilet where Dr. Phil sawed off his wrong foot. That was bloody hilarious. Oh wait, was that in ‘Scary Movie 4’?

Favorite line
Adam: I went to bed in my shithole apartment and I woke up in an actual shithole.

99) THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST

Why is it on the list?
Because its in freaking Aramaic, that’s why! Who the hell is crazy enough to make a film spoken completely in an arcane language that nobody understands, but is the correct language spoken at the time? Obviously, its not Roland Emmerich (of ‘10,000 BC’). Yup, Mel Gibson. Sadly, this movie didn’t receive much praise due to its anti-semitic nature. I say screw the Jews. Why prevent a story from being told if that’s the truth. God knows how many holocaust-related movies we have to sit through and feel sympathy for the Jews. This is a story that has to be told, about the life and time of Jesus of Nazareth and Gibson is the only person with balls big enough to do it, even though the critics (obviously Jews) slammed him until he’s being shuddered by Hollywood. For that Mel, you definitely get a place on my list. And it’s about Jesus freaking Christ! Jesus!

Favorite scene
The crucifixion scene. Jim Caviezel performance was so good here that he managed to channel the pain his character is feeling to us. Brilliant performance, Jim. I do wonder how Daniel Day-Lewis would have pulled off that scene because he is, after all, Mel’s first choice.

Favorite line
Jesus: You have heard it said you shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. For if you love only those who love you, what reward is there in that?

98) CLOSER

Why is it on the list?
A simple movie, yet very good. If you look at the credits, there’s only Jude Law, Clive Owen, Natalie Portman, Julia Roberts, a taxi driver and a customs officer. Who needs a hundred actors to make a film work? Mike Nichols did a wonderful job here focusing on the domestic lives of four individuals whose lives were somehow intertwined. And I am a sucker for films where lives are intertwined. And there are scandals as well, which is always good. And the whole love at first sight bit. I am so into that kinda shit, especially the initial meeting between Jude and Natalie. That was so freaking sweet. But the outstanding performance by the four cast members is what truly made this movie great.

Favorite scene
Natalie Portman’s little dance sequence. Man, I didn’t even know she’s that hot. And the way she’s toying around with Clive Owen. That’s what you call a tease, baby! Also, Clive Owen did a good job in that scene playing a horny bugger. It’s as if he’s being natural and not acting.

Favorite line
Larry: Depressives don’t want to be happy. They want to be unhappy to confirm they’re depressed. If they were happy they couldn’t be depressed anymore. They’d have to go out into the world and live. Which can be depressing.

97) LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE

Why is it on the list?
This movie is the only indie film that I actually liked. I mean, I hate independent films. But this film, which is about a dysfunctional family, works for me. Probably because my own family is as crazy as it can be and somehow, I was able to relate to this story. Each character here is so deranged and unique in a way that you are curious to see how they’re able co-exist and venture out on a journey together, in a van, to help achieve the little girl’s dream. And boy, did they go through a lot on that little adventure. A truly great independent film

Favorite scene
When Abigail Breslin’s Olive performed at the pageant. I have been wondering what sort of routine she’s been secretly working out with her Grandpa. Honestly, it caught me by surprise. And the reaction from the pedophiles. God, that was priceless.

Favorite line
Grandpa: Jesus, I’m tired. I’m so fucking tired. You know how tired I am? If a girl came up to me and begged me to fuck her, I couldn’t do it. That’s how tired I am.

96) LORD OF WAR

Why is it on the list?
A movie about dealing in firearms. We have seen a lot of movies about drug-dealing but never on illegal arms-dealing, especially on the scale depicted here. And also how efficient these people are and how they believe it is their goal that everyone should be equipped with a Kalashnikov. It’s on the list because it opens our eyes on a trade that we shall never witness in our dull little lives and its brutal consequences to those whose lives depend on this trade. A terrific eye-opener.

Favorite scene
The opening credits, that is the life and death of a single bullet. Like, how often can you say that your favorite scene from a movie is the opening credits, right? (Fikri: ‘Wolverine’?) There’s something about that scene. About how initially you’re all curious to see how a bullet is being made and then at the end, it suddenly hits you when that bullet penetrated the chest of the young African boy.

Favorite line
Yuri: There are over 550 million firearms in worldwide circulation. That’s one firearm for every twelve people on the planet. The only question is: How do we arm the other 11?

95) KING KONG

Why is it on the list?
I know, this a draggy movie but I was too occupied with the visuals to notice it. I have never seen the previous King Kong films, the one with Fay Wray and the other one with Jessica Lange. Thus, I have nothing good to compare this movie to and for me, I liked it. I mean, it’s certainly better that ‘Mighty Joe Young’. And its not only Kong, but there are other creatures at play here as well (although you have seen most of them in ‘Jurassic Park’), but still, its nice to see them again. However, I have to say that I hate that scene at the Central Park, the whole ice skating bit. That was just laughable. But the real star for me is Naomi Watts as Ann Darrow. She’s just too adorable and to act in a 3 hour long movie when most of the time, you’re acting with a non-existent animal, it’s not that easy. So big up to Naomi.

Favorite scene
When Kong fought with the V-Rexes. I have nothing to say here besides that it was rather thrilling. Also, the stampede scene with the Brachiosauruses. I remembered that my heart was thumping madly during that scene.

Favorite line
Carl Denham: Monsters belong in B movies.

94) THE 40-YEAR-OLD-VIRGIN

Why is it on the list?
I didn’t like it at first, but it grew on me. The thing about Judd Apatow is that you can really relate to his jokes on a personal level. There were many times during this movie when I went, “Hey, that is so true!” It’s a movie written by an average Joe. This movie certainly is much better than ‘Knocked Up’ because Seth Rogen is much better playing support than lead and we get none of that annoying bitch, Katherine Heigl. Although I am not the biggest fan of Steve Carell, but here, he pulled off the titular role compellingly.

Favorite scene
When Steve Carell’s Andy was about to get it on with Elizabeth Bank’s Beth. That was hot. In that scene, you really hope that he would lose his virginity then and there but part of you also hoped that he will end up with Catharine Keener’s Trish indeed. And the best part is when Seth Rogen’s Cal came to finish it off.

Favorite line
David: You know how I know you’re gay?
Cal: How?
David: You like Coldplay.

93) MASTER AND COMMANDER: THE FAR SIDE OF THE WORLD

Why is it on the list?
The movie about Captain Jack. No, not Sparrow, but Aubrey. I have to say this movie is not for everyone. Think ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’, but without the fun and mystical elements. Its seafaring on a more serious note and no it’s not about pirates. Taken place during the Napoleonic Wars, the ship follows a British Royal Navy vessel, the HMS Surprise, as they pursue Little Nappy’s Acheron, which is a much larger French warship. This is Russell Crowe’s second best performance after ‘Gladiator’ and the rest of the cast, especially Paul Bettany, did a wonderful job as well. Again, the movie is slow but for those who know how to appreciate good-filmmaking, this is a masterpiece. It makes you see what everyday life aboard a naval vessel is like in those days and you’re never bored, thanks to Peter Weir’s brilliant direction.

Favorite scene
I actually love watching the dinner scenes and the violin sessions that followed. Its feels like the movie is taking a break by showing the lives of these sailors when their thoughts are not occupied with war.

Favorite line
Capt. Jack Aubrey: Do you want to see a guillotine in Piccadilly?
Crew: No!
Capt. Jack Aubrey: Want to call that raggedy-ass Napoleon your king?
Crew: No!
Capt. Jack Aubrey: You want your children to sing the “La Marseillaise?”
Crew: NO!

92) GOSFORD PARK

Why is it on the list?
This feels weird. ‘Gosford Park’ in ‘my’ top 100? I know I tend to use the word ‘brilliant’ a lot when describing a movie, but this is the brilliant movie, further proven by its Oscar win for Original Screenplay. The movie showcases the lives of those living upstairs and those living downstairs, i.e. the masters and their servants, at a 4-day hunting party at an English country mansion. The great thing about this movie is how systematic the upstairs/downstairs system was depicted and the attention to detail given to things such as the arrangement of cutleries on a dinner table. Then of course there was the murder and how it was viewed upon by those living upstairs as well as those living downstairs. Basically, its a freaking weird movie and its so weird that its so freaking great.  A highly recommended watch.

Favorite scene
When the servants were walking into the house for the first time and Helen Mirren’s Mrs. Wilson was naming them based on their master’s name. The servants lost their identities then and it was rather sad, seeing how their masters define who they are. And their loyalty reminds me of house-elves.

Favorite line
Lord Stockbridge: When a man’s as short as you are, it must be difficult to gauge the height of the birds.

91) KUNG FU PANDA

Why is it on the list?
The most entertaining cartoon I have seen. Yea, yea, Pixar’s great you know but at the end of the day, Pixar’s not really a cartoon but more like a lesson in life. This movie literally kicks-ass. Its action sequences are the best I have seen in an animated movie. And it’s not all action but there’s heart as well with some important lessons being told, the best of which is stated under my favorite line below. Certainly the most awesome animated movie released by Dreamworks to date.

Favorite scene
Tai-Lung’s prison escape sequence. Who would’ve thought that an animated action sequence can be that cool? Plus, its our first look at how incredible Tai-Lung is. We’ve heard how terrifying he is before and thus, when the prison scene was shown, you get all the more curious to see what he is capable of and he doesn’t bloody disappoint. Picking a lock with a feather? A feather!

Favorite line
Oogway: Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.

Fazil‘s determination to do this made Fikri wish that he had thought of this idea first…